So, after having the DVD box set of Star Wars since it came out but not yet watched the special features stuff (as I was avoiding anything that might be to do with EpIII) I finally planked myself down to watch Empire of Dreams.

Everything was going swimmingly until the 67th minute when the DVD ‘sticks’. So, I tried stopping it then playing again. Didn’t do anything, it’s still a static screen. So, I tried fast forwarding it a bit. This causes the DVD to jump back 15 minutes to the beginning of the previous chapter (why there’s only about 6 chapters on a 2 1/2 hour documentary I don’t know).

Annoyed that it’s skipped backwards, I try to find some sort of search function on the remote control that will let me jump back to the position I was at (i.e. 67 minutes). The only button that looks like it would do this is the search key. So I press this and it brings up a menu telling me interesting things like what chapter and title I’m currently on, what the bit rate of the DVD is and how many angles and such there are. But no options to search.

After trying a few buttons, I decide that this is pointless and start fast forwarding my way through to the bit that everything stuck at before.

As the player gets to round about the position that it broke down at before, the fast-forwarding picture starts to stutter and jump around a bit. I hit play but everything freezes for a couple of seconds and then jumps back the 15 minutes again to the start of the previous chapter.

I’ve very annoyed by this point.

The DVD player in the living room has always been a bit crap, so I decide to bring through the player from the bedroom (I’ve been meaning to do this for a while anyways). Ten minutes of moving stuff around and crawling on the floor to get to plugs and the DVD’s set up.

I bung the disk in and use the search button on the ‘new’ DVD player to jump to the right bit in the film. About 30 seconds later everything freezes again. I press the stop button and the DVD ignores me. After the dozenth press of eject, the disc comes back out. I have a look at the back of it to make sure there aren’t any massive scratches or jam stuck to it. There’s a little bit of dirt on it, but nothing major.

Anyways, this gets me hopes up that this is what’s been responsible for spoiling my enjoyment of the film. So, put the DVD back in, wait till menu comes up, go into film and jump forward to the 67th minute. Except it still doesn’t play. Just a static, distorted screen.

I press stop. Nothing happens. I press eject. Nothing happens.

At this point, I lose my temper. I throw the remote onto the floor and go over to the DVD player, hammer the power button off then back on then jab the eject key until it gives me my disc out.

By this point, I’ve lost all interest in watching the rest of the film. All I want to do is get a large hammer and smash the DVD player to bits. Or break anything.

The cat seems to sense my anger and stays out of my way.

So now I find myself plonked in front of the computer, trying to calm myself down while reliving it all through this writing.

Can’t beat a relaxing start to the weekend, eh?